匿名情感陪审团。

Together 1 year. Saw his phone briefly today. There's a thread with his ex from 6 months ago, restarted last week — on her birthday he initiated: "happy birthday, remember our coffee place? It's still there :)". She replied. They've been chatting since. When I confronted him: "we're just friends, you're being insecure". The fact he never mentioned they were back in contact is what's eating me. He hasn't cheated. But he's maintaining a connection I don't know about, under the cover of "friendship". Am I being paranoid?

3 months in. We've been AA from day one — fine by me, modern relationship. Last week was my birthday. He suggested a place near my place, made the reservation, walked in saying "happy birthday". I ordered, he ordered, we ate. When the bill came he said "AA right?" with a straight face. He charged me $84, half of which was a cake that had my name iced on it. When I asked "wait, is this not your treat?" he said "I picked the place — that IS the treat". I laughed it off. Now I can't stop thinking about it. Is this normal?

Mid-size SG company, just received a 3-year Zurich transfer offer. Doubled salary, permanent residency track. My bf is in the SG public sector, PR, stable but capped. I said "quit and come with me, 3 years". He said "I'm 32, coming back at 35 with no relevant network kills my career". I asked "do you support me going then?". He said "of course, but it means 3 years apart". He hasn't blocked me. He also hasn't proposed anything. We've been together 4 years. I've already given up TWO previous overseas offers for him. I don't want to make it three. But his refusal feels like the cleaner truth: maybe my career was never really his priority.

Been together 6 months. I noticed she's followed every ex I've ever mentioned by name. Even ones I dated briefly 5 years ago. She likes their photos — not all, but enough that it can't be a coincidence. I asked her about it. She said "I just like to see who's in your life". I haven't mentioned half these people for years. They're not in my life. Is this sweet curiosity or a low-key surveillance pattern?

Best friend of 8 years. BF of 2 years. Last Wednesday I had a late work night. My best friend took my bf to a Japanese place in Holland Village. Just the two of them. Neither mentioned it. I found out because another friend posted them in an IG story. When I asked my bf: "she wanted to talk about her dating life, didn't think you'd mind". When I asked her: "you've been so busy, didn't want to bother you, it wasn't a date". Both of them independently decided not to mention it. I don't know who to be angrier at — him, her, or myself for not being chill about it.

Met his family in March. Last weekend we had dinner with my parents. Halfway through he raised a glass and announced "we're thinking about getting married next year". I had not said yes. We had not even discussed a date. He looked at me like I was supposed to play along. My mum cried. He hasn't apologised — said "it slipped out, I assumed we were on the same page". Are we??